When is the time right?

God is working on me (again). It was less than two months after my wife's death, and I am getting new ideas for ministry. I am reading things that are stirring my soul. I spent Lent praying what we Methodists call the Covenant Prayer in the Wesleyan Tradition. Basically, I gave up control on what I do to God. I've done that before this year and I will need to do it many times before I die. It's really a daily thing. Sometimes I need to do it more than once a day. I think we all have a desire for control, even if we say otherwise.

Where to begin? The Methodist movement was originally a small group revival within the Church of England. John Wesley got people to meet together and take discipleship and accountability seriously. It birthed a new branch on the Christian tree, even though Wesley never wanted to create a separate denomination. The "class meetings" were the backbone of the church. The foundation of a groundswell of growth in faith. Then somewhere along the line we decided that we had "made it" as a denomination and chose to look more like other branches of the tree. The classes fell out of use. Our church has declined in the US ever since. I feel the need to help show that it can work again. The vision I have been given is for house groups to form in neighborhoods to practice a modern, methodical gathering like the class meeting. The meeting in each participating neighborhood would come together to worship as an overall community. The "congregation" is the membership of the classes combined together. It would not be a typical congregation or a typical worship since the hope is to begin the groups with people who are unchurched or disaffected Christians. I keep thinking it may have a Unitarian feel to it with a target population that has little or no Christian background. Lots of questions to be asked. Few assumptions made. Faith from scratch.

The challenge is to work this while avoiding conflict with the congregation I currently serve. I have no interest in breeding dissent or schism in our congregation. There are many prayers and conversations to be had before this can go from hypothesis to theory. I have begun to have those conversations with trusted advisors. God is still painting the picture, so I'll just have to be patient.

I keep feeling that this is a good use for a deacon: doing what could be considered missional work with people who haven't made a decision for or against Christ. I would be working with exactly the people the Book of Discipline calls deacons to serve. The rub is that the work is usually considered an elder's role. This is radical. This is risk taking. I am thrilled to think that God might allow me to be a part of it. It will turn me upside down. With God's blessing, it might be an example of how we can turn the church right side up again. Not my doing, but God's. Not my will, but God's. Praise God.

Accountability - Not so random guidance

An amazing thing happened to me last week. A trusted friend held me accountable for a decision I made that had very unintentionally hurt my wife. He told me what he had seen, and called on me to get to work on it.

Seems simple enough, I suppose. But if it were easy to do then everyone would do it for those around them. It's simple, but not easy. My friend - my spiritual brother - knew he had permission to call me to account for my actions. We've spent three and a half years of friendship getting ready for him to do that for me. We meet with a group of folks almost weekly for lunch, developing relationships that matter to our lives. We share what we're comfortable with, and some things that stretch our comfort but need to be shared. We are accepted in our successes and in our stupidity because we are all quite capable of making mistakes and we know it.

He knew me well enough to know that I was blind to what I was doing. He also knows that my wife is important enough to me that I would want to know about it, and get kicked in the butt for it. How else was he going to help me? Letting it pass is easier, but it wouldn't have helped anyone.

I believe we are given the opportunity for real, powerful relationships so that we may help each other out. Two heads are better than one, it is said. More eyes to see, more synapses to fire, more perspectives to consider. It's a blessing to have such friends, and I have more than one.

Where are you experiencing real relationships in your life? Who's "got your back," not just to cover for you but to show you your blind spots? Everyone needs people like this in their lives. You, too. Consider who you might build that kind of trust with and get to it.